“Tonight’s Forecast, A Freeze Is Coming”

Batman (George Clooney) and Robin (Chris O’Donnell) face two new challenging villains. They are Mr. Freeze (Arnold Schwarzenegger) who is building a weapon to ransom Gotham for money to find a cure for his terminally ill wife, and Poison Ivy (Uma Thurman) who seeks to punish humanity for its environmental destruction. Meanwhile, Robin feels like Batman doesn’t trust him. Their faithful butler Alfred (Michael Gough) is slowly dying. And Alfred’s niece Barbara (Alicia Silverstone) is poking around Wayne Manor. Will the Bat-family survive?

“If I Must Suffer, Humanity Will Suffer With Me”

One of Batman and Robin’s biggest problems is that the film has numerous plotlines competing for screentime and many of their tones clash greatly. One minute we are indulging in silly slapstick action and ice puns, then we are suddenly dealing with a long-time Bat-family member gradually losing their life. Furthermore, because of the bloated story, several plotlines feel underdeveloped (Batgirl’s subplot) or pointless (Bane’s inclusion).

As well as this some of the film’s components feel very slapdash and can take you out of the experience. This includes the writing plot holes. For example, Mr. Freeze using a machine powered by huge diamonds to ransom Gotham rather than selling the diamonds on the black market. Which would probably be just as profitable. Along with this some of the CGI has aged incredibly poorly. The human figures move very unnaturally and a few sequences look barely finished.

And of course, there is the grating cheesy dialogue and the performances from Arnold Schwarzenegger, Chris O’Donnell, and Alicia Silverstone which range from bland to irritating to hilariously misjudged.

“You Lie”

Unfortunately, a lot of good-faith criticism of Batman and Robin is lost among complaints about its deviation from the darkness of Tim Burton’s Batman films and Batman and Robin’s suits having nipples and rubber bums. You can prefer the Tim Burton films over Batman and Robin. But, a lighter tone doesn’t necessarily make a film bad. And complaining about something as harmless as Bat-bums/nipples feels petty and slightly homophobic through its ridicule of something potentially appealing to a gay audience. It’s therefore regrettable that these complaints are what largely stuck with the film.

“That Is The Nature Of Family”

However, Batman and Robin does have genuinely praiseworthy elements. Firstly, there is Elliot Goldenthal’s music. Full of bombastic epic sweeps and sultry seduction. It makes the film feel exciting throughout and is a fine listen.

Then there are the undervalued performances by George Clooney, Uma Thurman, and Michael Gough. Clooney perfectly fits the role of playboy Bruce Wayne. He also adds a sly self-awareness to his Batman which makes him an enjoyable presence. Additionally, this allows him to get away with his cheeky humour more than other cast members. Uma Thurman is an absolute blast as Poison Ivy. She really embodies Ivy’s seductive and bold nature and every time she appears her energy makes it impossible to look away. That said Michael Gough is the film’s true star. Effortlessly humorous and heartfelt, his interactions with the Bat-family, particularly Clooney, add real dramatic weight to proceedings. Truthfully his storyline is worth the watch alone.

Finally, the cheesy dialogue, flimsy plot, varying acting quality, tonally mismatched story elements, loud colours, wild theatrical costumes, and other elements combine well to create a fun, campy atmosphere that helps excuse some of the film’s worst excesses. Making the film genuinely entertaining to watch despite itself.

Was It Really That Bad? No

Regrettably, most audiences only view Batman and Robin as a punching bag. Yes, the film has a story, CG, and minor acting problems but it also has many aspects to appreciate and enjoy. Including its infectious atmosphere, its music, and some underappreciated performances. After years of dour, joyless Batman films, we need something as unapologetically bright and fun as Batman and Robin.

Also Read: The Batman: Snyderverse and the DCEU

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Back in 2009, after the disappointing third instalment, came Terminator: Salvation. Moving on from Judgement Day, the post-apocalyptic war with the machines is in full swing, and Batman is John Connor. While Bale’s infamous rant is more well-remembered than the film itself, several other sequels have come and gone. Salvation currently sits at a 6.5 on IMDb, the highest of any post T2. So is it really that bad?

“There is no fate but what we make”

Salvation is set in the distant future of 2018. Judgement Day has been and gone, Skynet is at war with humanity. John Connor is all grown up and fighting the machines. Which seems like the natural next step for the series and actually seeing the future is pretty cool. Some of the new terminator designs are also interesting, but nothing comes close to the T-800 or T-1000. Christian Bale makes Connor the figure he is described as in the original. Likewise, Yelchin’s Kyle Reese is an interesting younger version of the one we know. As a premise, that’s pretty solid and interesting.

The film focuses on Marcus, a criminal who sold his body to science and wakes up in this dark future. Upon his resurrection, he meets Kyle Reese, who is looking for the resistance. John Connor meanwhile has a plot to destroy Skynet and the film jumps between these two stories. All seems pretty promising so far. Unfortunately, Marcus isn’t much of a character. This is likely due to rewrites, where John Connor appeared briefly at the end before his role was expanded. But the most interesting thing about him is the obvious twist – he’s a terminator. It does actually seem like a logical jump, after all, the T-800 learnt to about being human. But the film never does much with it

“We’ve been at war since before either of us even existed”

The reveal that Marcus is a terminator, while interesting, is blindingly obvious. It does lead to an interesting exchange with Connor when the two finally meet, but when the evil plan is revealed to Marcus, it’s too late to care. It also makes little sense, with Kyle Reese already being a prisoner, the machines can just kill him and win. No going back in time so no John Connor. Game over.

Despite the weak plot, the action itself is serviceable, except for the finale. The final battle opts for the usual terminator in a factory battle, like every other film in the series. Except for this time, Arnie is CG because he was busy. Like the rest of the film, it looks the part but isn’t particularly inventive. The final battle, despite supposedly the whole resistance launching an assault, only features John and Marcus. Even Kyle Reese, who most of the film has revolved around in some form, sits out the fight.

The ending is perhaps a microcosm of the film itself, a lot of potential and interesting ideas but not wanting to alienate fans. After being mortally wounded by the T-800, John Connor is dying. Earlier drafts of the script featured Marcus taking on his likeness to continue his legacy and inspire hope. An even darker ending would have “John Connor” proceed to kill everyone. While these would certainly be controversial twists, at least they would be memorable and make an impact. As is, Marcus sacrifices himself to save John Connor and…that’s it. The heroes fly away, and the credits roll

Was it really that bad?…. Yes

Despite having some adequate dumb action scenes, the characters are so uninteresting that there is no reason to care what happens to them. The events of the film don’t seem to make much of an impact on the character or the war. Nor does it add anything to the previous entries. It just feels rather mechanical. There is a great deal of potential here, it’s just a shame none of it is realised. Perhaps in an alternate timeline, this would be a much better film.

Also Read: Was It Really That Bad?: Jennifer’s Body

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